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Jul 19, 2008

Gods, Men and Many Beliefs Part 2

Hi guys,

I guess you could call this part 2 of my speel about Gods, Men and Many Beliefs: but this time I thought I would focus more on the whole feminist aspect of my beliefs: and how also I dont really fit the absolute feminine mould.

Ok...I believe that men do hold too much hetrosexual power over everything, and have successfully dominated women for thousands of years. I think there has been too much of a seperation between home (woman's domain: that's if she can be fully dominating of anything) and outside work (man's domain...sigh), with no real flexiablity between (unless of course, you are a prositute or sex worker). A lot of this inequality and inflexiablity has been caused by holy books (eg. Bible, Koran, etc) and religion. I think to myself sometimes that wouldn't it be ironic that whoever wrote the bible, koran etc, harboured a real hatred of women and that for centuries, society has been blindly following the words of these books, and these obsessive, women hating men who wrote them...hehe...lol

That is not to say that I don't think that it is wrong for women to be in the home. Quite the opposite: I think they should have the choice, without judgement or inaquality (just as men should also have the choice to stay at home). I personally like being at home. Some of this is without doubt, because of my social conditioning, but mostly it is because I enjoy being at home! I don't care if you decide to work etc, because that is your choice: do with it as you will!

I am constantly amazed by any number of things, that women are judged on, particularily by other women (and once again, to a point this can be said to be caused by men and their enormous expectations of the female species). A lot of it revolves around parenting issues. People are very sensitive about particular things: and sometimes they can be quite small in the very big scheme of things. I was blown away recently by a friend of mine (who happens to be a mother) who was incredibly harsh and judgemental about attachment parenting. Now from where I stand, as a caregiver (and as also a caregiver to this friend's own children), I have found some of the methods of attachment parenting very helpful, particularily as a bonding device. I personally have never had a problem with sitting and rocking a baby/child to sleep, and I happen to be very good at it, and have done it for years! My next door neighbour does follow attachment parenting with her little boy, and in all my years of childcare, I have never seen a more well-adjusted child (Except for the Shannon's kids and they had a similar, very involved parental relationship). This is not to say I think the other mother is doing anything wrong, I just think she shut a door very quickly on something which I have found works wonderfully with her own 3 children.

But never mind,
It all comes down to choice, and choices that particular parts of the masculine society don't give us, as women.


1 comment:

Janine said...

Having read and loved "The Continuum Concept" ( a bit of a precursor to Attachment Parenting) three decades ago before starting my own family, I could say that I have raised my three biological children and my numerous foster babies all this way (couldn't breast feed the fosterlings, unfortunately, but my bottle-feeding style follows closely) and I feel it works well in producing happy, secure toddlers, even if they started off as neglected, detached babies. But when I try to share these ideas with my fellow foster carers, even loaning them slings and pouches to carry their babies in, I don't get many followers. It's just so much more convenient to plop them down in a pram. And my habit of co-sleeping with babies and toddlers doesn't always go down well with either carers or workers....but nobody's told me I can't, and I think it's a very significant part of early attachment, so I'll continue. I'm not fostering to produce regulated little babies who sleep all night by four months and who are content to spend all day sitting in a baby chair, pusher or auto swing, I'm trying to help babies form a strong attachment to me and develope emotional resilience to deal with whatever the future holds for them (be it reunification or transition to adoption) so I keep them close to me as much as I can.... oops, sorry, didn't mean to turn this comment into a whole post!


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