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Feb 19, 2009

Excuses and Boundries

Well I had a very deep conversation with Justin last night.

I made one thing clear. That I am not coming back to Rocky until he at least comes out and sees me so we can discuss things.

I also told him that we need to set up some boundaries with his parents. Healthy borders between 2 separate families. And also that we need to have some intensive couples/family counseling.

I also informed him we need to find a financial counselor and get ourselves out of the mess we are in. In other words, get a plan and stick with it.

Along the way he attempted to make excuse after excuse: and I refused to listen. I told him that he had chosen his mother over me, in discussing the decision with her not me. And regardless of the rush he was in, he could have found the time to call me. And that because of that decision I refuse to pay for anything to do with that apartment (except for the storage unit fees), at least until we a have that very big discussion I had mentioned.



Doctor Dark said...

Hi Jo,

It doesn't sound like things have played out very nicely on your end. I wish I knew what to say, but all I can think of is that I'm sorry your in-laws are being so childish about this whole thing. I am a little surprised at their stubbornness. And I know what you mean about them having 'got' something over you guys. Maybe you and Justin should move to WA? :-P

I'm sorry that your situation has become so difficult again, but you've got a roof over your head and you still have the pets and taking them into consideration will probably help you out.

That's all I can think of in reassurance, hope it's okay. :-$


Shalini said...

hi mate
here from LFCA - firstly, sorry that you're going through all this crap right now. relationships are hard enough without all the extra baggage both parties often bring to the table. I hope that Justin sees the sense in what you're trying to do, you're trying to make things better and have a plan going forward. Guys can be so freaking lame sometimes when it comes to discussing emotions or making commitments to future plans(no offence to any reading this!) but I've had some issues with my marriage too, and it takes two to make it work. One trying hard can only go so far! I really, really hope it sorts itself for you! Supposed to be for better or for worse, right? Did they forget that?! xx

twondra said...

Here from L&F. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you! (((HUGS)))


Seriously? - Erin said...

Here from ICLW. I have had similar problems with my husband when we first got married. I felt like he was always picking his mom or his family over me.

Had a big talk, he had a big talk with his mom and things are a bit better. At least now she calls most of the time before she barges in...

Best of Luck.

Stacie said...


Wow. Good for you for standing up for yourself and letting him know that you expect boundaries. Now, I hope he understands the importance of all of this and follows through. Sending hugs your way.

nh said...

Here from ICLW

Sorry that you are having to deal with this. It's difficult having to make the man you love understand what you need. Make sure you really enforce those boundaries!


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